When you are presented with a clear path toward a goal you would not have chosen for yourself, it’s important to check your motives. Achieving success in life isn’t just about intelligence, competence or experience. The key to beating your competition and succeeding is the ‘winning attitude.’
In every moment we can pick a new direction – how to act, how to react, how others’ moods, as well as how these decisions will affect you and how you will affect others. These choices are not made only once but every moment of every day. These decisions mould and sculpt your experiences and actions in the moment and eventually your day and life. When things happen that are not to your liking you can either allow them to bring you down or choose to find the opportunities in them. Your initial decision is what matters. Your choice to “do it” screams messages of hope and belief in yourself. Don’t get me wrong, not having things turn out the way you hoped totally stinks! But don’t let that beat you down and keep you there. Remember that your effort to make it happen is the most important part. Your time on this planet is very short. The more you put on your plate, the faster your time will go. The less time you’ll have for those things which matter most because a lot of people don’t do well simply because they major in minor things.
If you lack a clear and compelling vision, you will frequently be swayed by lesser goals. In such a case, you’ll be driven by achievement and/or external validation. Hence, there is an enormous difference between true success and achievement. Success is how you feel about yourself, and can only comes from living in alignment with who you truly want to be. Achievement is an external indicator of something you’ve done, which in itself doesn’t qualify you for success. You can only be successful spending as little time as possible on things you hate. It’s all about the right attitude. When life presents its numerous challenges, you begin to lose faith in your abilities. It is then that positive attitude helps you navigate all the difficulties and face the challenges boldly. It makes you better equipped to overcome the odds and puts you back on the road to success. Nothing happens unless you choose to act now. Change happens in the moment, not over time. The effect of what we choose, of the changes we have made, happen over time and we get to choose again and again in the moment.
Life is a series of natural and spontaneous changes. Don’t resist them; that only creates sorrow. Let reality be reality. Let things flow naturally forward in whatever way they like because to improve is to change; to be perfect is to change often.
It’s often said that change is the only constant in life. Yet humans are evolutionarily predisposed to resist change because of the risk associated with it. Despite this resistance to change, it is more important than ever. Most people are not happy with their life. Yet they continually venture down the same road of unhappiness. Never willing to change. As you take a birds eye view of your current lifestyle, do you like what you see? Are your relationships, career choices, financial situation and other aspects of your life truly satisfying? Or do you feel there should be more? If you don’t like change, you will like irrelevance even less because change means that what was before wasn’t perfect. People want things to be better. Sometimes it is necessary to sort through the main issues in our lives and work out what is really bothering us. Chances are, it’s not the events themselves but the thoughts and feelings behind them that are causing the emotional disturbance.
Change doesn’t necessarily come about as a result of what we think will precipitate it and when it doesn’t, it’s easy to conclude that it can’t happen. There’s something attractive, even compelling about believing that making substantive changes in our lives is unrealistic or even impossible but we need to understand that every journey in our life started with a single step forward, as long as you keep moving, you will eventually begin to change your life. When deciding you want change in your life, you must truly get upset with your current situation. Your emotions are very powerful. And you’ll find that by using this energy as a catalyst for change, your desired life will be within your grasp. We need to remind ourselves always that no matter who you are, no matter what you did, no matter where you’ve come from, you can always change, become a better version of yourself. Whatever your scenario may be, you must make a drastic shift in your mentality. Keep in mind, the more significant your desired life outcome, the stronger your convictions for change must be. Learning to love and enjoy YOU is the most important tool in changing your life too because at the end of the day, all you have is you, so learning how to love yourself, support yourself and be your best friend is paramount.
You must pay for everything in this world one way and another. There is nothing free with the exception of God’s grace. We do bargaining everyday in our life. Every action of ours is followed by an outcome, which is the cost we pay for the action we have taken. Sometimes we do not pay attention to what we are doing, how we are behaving and how that will affect our life. Even small things sometimes make huge difference in our life.
It’s easy to make excuses for why you cannot do things. But nothing in life is free, and not every goal is going to be simple to reach. Regardless of position, situation, or circumstance, if you want something you have to work for it. Isn’t it good to know that you don’t have to be perfect to be used by God. You don’t have to have it all together to accomplish something meaningful and lasting. Nothing is going to come right away, and if you’re looking for a quick-fix for everything, you’re not going to find it and you might as well just give up now if you insist on keeping the same attitude. If life wasn’t challenging, we’d all grow bored. God can take whatever he has already given you to do what he has created you to do before you were ever born. We just have to have the faith to believe that without being perfect and without living up to other’s opinions about us we can live a life that is both dynamic as well as pleasing and acceptable to God. Life isn’t always going to be everything you expect it to be. But you gotta suck it up and stick it out. Be glad you even have a life. So many people have wanted to live theirs and were denied the opportunity. Live yours, without excuses, and with less worry. Just take a breath, grit your teeth, smile, and keep trucking because nothing in life worth having comes easy. Nothing in life that is worth having is free. Nothing in life worth having is not without a fight.
How can we forgive others, if we can’t even forgive ourselves? None of us are perfect and we all have flaws.
It’s not about forgiving another. Forgiveness is not about forgiving your parents, friends, loved ones. Forgiveness exists when you love yourself so much you realize all the choices you’ve made were the best choices you could make at that point in time. Nothing in life blocks the feelings of gratitude more than anger and resentment. This is why I say that the practice of gratitude requires the work of forgiveness. One can never feel grateful to your loved one who has done you wrong or abused you while you are still angry about their wrong doings, abuse or insensitivity, nor can one ever receive the gifts of a relationship that has ended. If you can forgive your friend, or even a stranger, why can’t you forgive yourself? we have to learn how to forgive ourselves. While the careless among us waste little time or conscience berating themselves for the mistakes that they have made, the overly self-conscious can’t seem to stop beating themselves over the head.
Forgiveness does not change the past, but it does enlarge the future and only you can come to the place where you want to forgive. What helps the forgiveness process is to actually understand that resentment is a second-hand attitude or emotion, plus also a cover for underlying feelings that you have never expressed. Learn from the hurt and pain that people have caused you. If you really took the time to express fully what your hurt and pain is and state your new boundary, you’ll begin to be grateful for the lessons the wound has taught you. You will be able to stand up for yourself, be kinder towards others, stop hurting other people’s feelings, betraying them or whatever the case may be. True forgiveness is not an action after the fact, it is an attitude with which you enter each moment. It’s fine to have high expectations for one’s self, but not if it means destroying your own self-esteem. What loving yourself does mean, is that you learn to have self-respect and you take care of your body, mind and spirit — it means having a sense of purpose in life, striving to improve ourselves and working to help others. For me, it really means “I love me and thus, I love you” — and if everyone centers their life around love and compassion, the world becomes a much, much better place.
Faith that it’s not always in your hands or things don’t always go the way you planned, but you have to have faith that there is a plan for you, and you must follow your heart and believe in yourself no matter what. Have Faith and Believe In Yourself.
If you truly want to be respected by people you love, you must prove to them that you can survive without them. You are a piece of the puzzle of someone else’s life. You may never know where you fit, but others will fill the holes in their lives with pieces of you. A person without faith in themselves is like a candle without a flame, though it may have a physical presence, it is not really living up to its full potential because it is not providing any light to the world. Having faith in ones own self, is a quality that breeds more qualities. Believe in yourself, take on your challenges, dig deep within yourself to conquer fears. Never let anyone bring you down. You got to keep going. Don’t let fear or insecurity stop you from trying new things. Believe in yourself. Do what you love. And most importantly, be kind to others, even if you don’t like them.
The biggest difference I’ve noticed between successful people and unsuccessful people isn’t intelligence or opportunity or resources. It’s the belief that they can make their goals happen. When someone is able to believe in themselves they are then able to dream, make plans, set goals for themselves, and be motivated and determined to do these things because of the faith they have in themselves. Those who have faith in themselves also rub off on the people around them, and usually help inspire people who are able to make a real change to the world. We must not be afraid to live as the people who we really are deep down in hearts, for in this world of darkness, every candle that is lit will help provide a great amount of light. Always remember that in order to succeed, your desire for success should be greater than your fear of failure because there is nothing more beautiful than believing in yourself.
Nobody can be perfect. But there is still immense value you can get from debugging those inconsistencies. Making the gap between your walk and your talk a little bit smaller.
Imperfections are part of life. I think it’s sad that some people feel that because being perfectly consistent with your values is impossible, that there is no point trying to debug the inconsistencies. Some self-improvement cynicism is the result of demanding the impossible, expecting perfection instead of progress. It’s a tough world. People step on each other to rise higher and sell each other out to earn more. There are some people who just don’t want to compete. What they earn is more than enough for some people. If you have peace with it and genuinely don’t care about earning more, then this post was not meant for you. But if you picked your path just to be safe from all this chaos, then hear me out.
Step out of the crowd of average people. Enter that game and change the values on the scoreboard. Conventional wisdom is a shortcut from actual thinking. When you rely on the majority to give you career, diet and spiritual advice you avoid thinking about these issues for yourself. Often when you peel off the covering, and start to understand the systems behind it, you can come up with more satisfying and less risky solutions to your problems. You cannot take long term decisions based on what the circumstances look like today. The road you take might seem safe right now, but what about tomorrow, next month, next year? You need to think about the future. You should not lower your expectations to meet your income, you should rise your income to meet your expectations. I’m still finding new tools, but the fact that this list is small shows that self-improvement doesn’t need to be overly complicated. One good tool, if practiced, can debug a large range of problems. Personal development and unconventional choices often lead to the most success. There are a lot of people around you who are secretly working for their dreams. You only see them out doing nothing but they spend their free time working hard. Never forget that. But despite their appearance, they often hold the least risk. So work harder. Take risks. That is the only way.
Do you ever feel like every area of your life is changing so fast and you’re just standing in the middle of it all, confused and directionless? You could consider a new beginning as the start of a new year. A fresh start, a new goal, a year to make your dreams come true. Be determined and persevere.
I have always been delighted at the prospect of a new day, a fresh try, one more start, with perhaps a bit of magic waiting somewhere behind the morning. Beginnings could happen more than once or in different ways. You could think you were starting something afresh, when actually what you were doing was carrying on as before. You don’t need endless time and perfect conditions. Do it now. Do it today. Do it for twenty minutes and watch your heart start beating. Life is simple. Everything happens for you, not to you. Everything happens at exactly the right moment, neither too soon nor too late. You don’t have to like it…it’s just easier if you do.
Don’t worry about being worried. You’re heading out on an adventure and you can always change your mind along the way and try something else. When everything seemingly falls apart, it’s more important than ever to get clear on the direction you want to go in as you move forward. Focus on how you want to feel in every area of life and then start doing activities that create those desired feelings. This is about you. Do what you can, with what you have, where you are. Life is full of misery, loneliness, and suffering – and it’s all over much too soon. Every time your heart is broken, a doorway cracks open to a world full of new beginnings, new opportunities. Nobody can give you wiser advice than yourself. One thing I know for sure is that we learn about ourselves through new experiences. So whatever the ending and new beginning is for you right now, allow yourself to be swept away by the sweet freedom that comes with it. Always remember that each day is a new life. Each moment is really a new life. What we call memories are really present thoughts. What we call anticipations are really present thoughts. No one has ever lived in any moment except the present.