How can we forgive others, if we can’t even forgive ourselves? None of us are perfect and we all have flaws.
It’s not about forgiving another. Forgiveness is not about forgiving your parents, friends, loved ones. Forgiveness exists when you love yourself so much you realize all the choices you’ve made were the best choices you could make at that point in time. Nothing in life blocks the feelings of gratitude more than anger and resentment. This is why I say that the practice of gratitude requires the work of forgiveness. One can never feel grateful to your loved one who has done you wrong or abused you while you are still angry about their wrong doings, abuse or insensitivity, nor can one ever receive the gifts of a relationship that has ended. If you can forgive your friend, or even a stranger, why can’t you forgive yourself? we have to learn how to forgive ourselves. While the careless among us waste little time or conscience berating themselves for the mistakes that they have made, the overly self-conscious can’t seem to stop beating themselves over the head.
Forgiveness does not change the past, but it does enlarge the future and only you can come to the place where you want to forgive. What helps the forgiveness process is to actually understand that resentment is a second-hand attitude or emotion, plus also a cover for underlying feelings that you have never expressed. Learn from the hurt and pain that people have caused you. If you really took the time to express fully what your hurt and pain is and state your new boundary, you’ll begin to be grateful for the lessons the wound has taught you. You will be able to stand up for yourself, be kinder towards others, stop hurting other people’s feelings, betraying them or whatever the case may be. True forgiveness is not an action after the fact, it is an attitude with which you enter each moment. It’s fine to have high expectations for one’s self, but not if it means destroying your own self-esteem. What loving yourself does mean, is that you learn to have self-respect and you take care of your body, mind and spirit — it means having a sense of purpose in life, striving to improve ourselves and working to help others. For me, it really means “I love me and thus, I love you” — and if everyone centers their life around love and compassion, the world becomes a much, much better place.
YOU are important! You have a unique purpose, that only you can fulfill. What you think of yourself is much more important than what other people think of you.
No matter who you are, you can provide value. We each have an individual purpose that cannot be compared to everyone else. You have a different perspective to share. You can shed light on a situation that maybe no one else can possibly provide. You can utilize your unique experiences to help and positively influence others. In order to be the best you period, you must be willing to show yourself love by making time for yourself. In a world full of hustle and bustle it is easy to get so distracted and so far away from the notion that spending time with yourself is one of the best investments that we are able to make in our lives. We must be willing to make time for ourselves in order to realize who we really are, to figure out which directions that we want to go in life, and to be able to plan how to get there. We must also make time for ourselves because doing so will help keep us sane. Sure having company and being around uplifting positive people is definitely healthy for us, but we will always need that little bit of me time as regularly as possible in order to never forget who we are, and how important being ourselves is. At the end of the day, always remember that You Are Important. STOP comparing yourself to everyone else. Value, appreciate and learn from others, but don’t cut yourself short. We have all unique abilities and talents. Always remain Humble and Kind but believe in yourself and appreciate Your Own Value.
There is no one else in the world that comes even close to being like you. You have your own individual strengths and talents. You have your own unique perspective that provides a very special kind of insight for the world. Be sharing your experiences and viewpoints you can benefit the lives of others around you. You have faced special challenges in the world that no one else has. Life is a great big challenge for everyone, you have been bucked off the horse of life time and again, but always had the strength to climb back on. Your challenges have developed you into a stronger individual, turn your challenges into lessons and help others to learn from them. You can Provide Happiness. You can Provide Joy into the lives of others. Make sure to tell those around you whom you love and care for, how much You Do Care. Give them a hug and a smile. Not only tell them, but SHOW THEM each day. Love and care provides continuous fulfillment in your life and the lives of others, keep spreading your kindness and love. You never know whose day you may brighten. Your Love, Care and Kindness Makes a Difference. The version you are of yourself today is not who you will be in 10 years from now. During the journey of life we are meant to consistently learn and grow. The sad truth is that some people never learn this fact and stop pushing themselves to forward. Be a LEADER. Leadership is about inspiring and influencing others. Leadership is about influencing others to achieve their own Greatness. YOU can be a Leader. No matter who you are, YOU can positively influence and lead others. You can lend a helping hand. You can provide encouragement. YOU can make a difference in the lives of others. Never underestimate yourself and your capabilities. Be Passionate, Be Genuine, Be Yourself. And always remember that YOU MATTER. You Are Important.
How much of your life is spent trying to please others? How often do you sacrifice who you truly are to maintain a certain image or to fulfill an expectation others have of you? When was the last time you felt fully alive in your own skin? Or totally in alignment with your values and what really matters to you?
We are all created for a purpose, and the only way to even begin our journey of fulfilling that purpose is to first give ourselves the permission to be happy. When we have begun to take charge of our lives, to own ourselves, there is no longer any need to ask permission of someone. While being you and truly sharing what you do will bring happiness to others, you won’t find contentment merely trying to keep others happy by taking responsibility for our lives we not only gain control of what happens. It also becomes natural to feel like you deserve more in life as your self-esteem builds and as you do the right thing more consistently. You feel better about yourself and this is critically important because it’s most often you that are standing in your own way and in the way of your success. It’s you that start to self-sabotage or hold yourself back in subtle or not so subtle ways once you are on your way to the success you dream of. To remove that inner resistance you must feel and think that you actually deserve what you want. You may be able to do a little about that by affirmations and other positive techniques. But the biggest impact by far comes from taking responsibility for yourself and your life. By doing the right thing.
Make the best use of what is in your power, and take the rest as it happens. It is often said that your thoughts become your actions. But without taking responsibility for your life those thoughts often just stay on that mental stage and aren’t translated into action. Taking responsibility for your life is that extra ingredient that makes taking action more of a natural thing. You don’t get stuck in just thinking, thinking and wishing so much. You become proactive instead of passive.Taking responsibility for your life is great. But that is also all that you have control over. You can’t control the results of your actions. You can’t control how someone reacts to what you say or what you do and it’s important to know where your limits are. Otherwise you’ll create a lot unnecessary suffering for yourself and waste energy and focus by taking responsibility for what you can’t and never really could control and hold yourself responsible for a higher standard than anybody expects of you. Never excuse yourself. Don’t go into the business of pleasing people. You can’t please everybody. Simply do your best at what you do.
This Christmas, I encourage you to give back and put a smile on someone’s face if you are able to. Every day when we pray, we ask for something good to happen to our lives. We seek refuge and hope that someone will come to help lighten our burdens each day. Sometimes too we look around and see people suffering around us. We hope that someone who can help them would do something and make them less miserable. The truth is, the world can be a better place if everyone spoke less about how much the world needs to change for the better but instead did something about it.
Most days, it’s easy to stay focused on our own lives. Our work, our problems, what we have to accomplish and what is stressing us out. But it’s easy to forget that everyone else in the world has just as much on their plate as we do – sometimes even more. During this season especially, it’s important to remember that every person you come in contact with has their own story and their own reasons for celebrating the season. So before you let the holiday madness stress you out and get the best of you, remember that everyone is fighting their own cold, snowy battle. You can be a blessing to others by speaking kind words, volunteering in your community, giving to charity, sharing things, giving food, sharing your testimony, praying for someone in need, listening to someone, etc.
There is always an opportunity to bless someone. The more we seek to bless others, God will provide for us and open more doors to accomplish His will. Money isn’t the only way to make a difference. Unfortunately, this idea is often what keeps many people from getting involved. They think that, because they don’t have tons of extra money to donate or invest, they have no way to help. But I saw the opposite of this more than ever this holiday season. There is always an opportunity to help others if you just lift your hands and reach out to do so. A blessing is not just money or any material thing that people wish for. The best blessing is you sharing yourself with the world. Remember never to pass up a chance to help someone in need. No matter how simple the task is, every little act of kindness counts. And when other people see how doing good works for you, they will do the same.
Some pursue happiness; others create it because the pursuit of happiness is simply one’s God given right to commit actions that allow a person to pursue happiness, so long as that pursuit does not deliberately involve interfering directly or indirectly with the happiness of others.
Happiness always looks small while you hold it in your hands, but let it go, and you learn at once how big and precious it is because your happiness is your responsibility. That may sound a little like tough love, but it’s actually just a reminder to you that your happiness is within your control. We must make a blueprint or goal for ourselves, get it approved by the man upstairs, then go about trying to reach this goal without letting any challenge or circumstance get in our way. It is easy to overlook our critical role of expressing emotion in creating our happiness. We are inclined to think of our emotions as a response to people and material things. One simple way this happens is that we hypnotize ourselves with words such as “He/She makes me happy.” Even the phrase, “I’m so happy you came to visit me.” can have an implied mental assumption that our emotions are because of them.
Happiness is not a mystery to solve or secret to be revealed in order to be experienced. It is so simple that just about any child can model it even if they can’t explain it. Happiness is a feeling created by the expression of your love coming out of you. When your love is coming out of you, you are happy. If you express emotions of fear and anger, you will experience fear and anger. How you feel is determined by the emotions you create. The reasons you create different emotions at different times is because of beliefs in the mind that respond to different triggers. Those beliefs are the artificial criteria telling us not to love, or that it is not safe to love. If we limit the expression of love by the criteria in the mind, we limit the happiness and joy in our life. Being aware that we create our emotions and that we can change the criteria in our mind is a big shift in responsibility and power over our happiness. Meaning that we shouldn’t just be content with the happiness we have created in the past, to maintain our happiness we must keep looking forward to creating it and we need to always remember that Happiness is when what you think, what you say, and what you do are in harmony.
Be soft. Do not let the world make you hard. Do not let the pain make you hate. Do not let the bitterness steal your sweetness. Take pride. Even though the rest of the world may disagree you still believe it to be a beautiful place.
If you can do no good, at least do no harm because it takes faith and hope to be soft after people have hurt you so much but we can’t blame our hurt on the world if we are strong enough to endure the pain then you are strong enough to hold on to your faith and most of all hold the hope. Basically we are all just trying to muddle through the day with as much dignity as possible, and it’s nice to think that somewhere there are people who are capable of more. When we see impressive people, we desperately want their guidance. We want to hear what they, who seem so much wiser than their peers, have to say. We all have experienced things in life that have given us a sort of thick skin, or as some may say pain that has caused up to put up a guard. Protecting ourselves is just part of our human nature, naturally no one wants to be hurt, and when we realize the things that hurt us we tend to stay away from them, or if we do go around the things that have made us hurt before, we go around them skeptically, sometimes with the intent to cause those things the pain that they may have caused us. Our natural human instincts of survival may be correlated with the way we treat our relationships. Since many of us have been hurt, some of us go about relationships skeptically, and with the intentions of hurting someone before they may have a chance of hurting us. It is important to remember that keeping a guard is fine, but to also trust your heart. Remember that the world is still a beautiful place and there are still nice people in it, sometimes you just have to take a chance and never forget that ” Joy Cometh in the morning ” regardless of how dark it seems now because a purpose of human life, no matter who is controlling it, is to love whoever is around to be loved. There is no reason why good cannot triumph as often as evil. The triumph of anything is a matter of organization.
When we can appreciate the good things in our lives, it leads to a sense of well-being. No matter our struggles, there is always someone out there in the world who is struggling harder because you will never fully believe in yourself if you keep comparing yourself to everyone else. Instead, compare yourself to who you were yesterday.
Usually when we find ourselves struggling and going through difficult times, we tend to focus mainly on the negative sides of our own life. In order to become happy again, we have to shift the focus back and see all the great and little things that are going on around us. Sometimes it helps to realize that there are some people out there who are going through even more challenging times in their lives while having even more limitations, and yet, they find ways to live a life full of joy and happiness. Perhaps they are happier because they are satisfied with what God has given them. I think most of us are influenced by the advertising that is prevalent everywhere we look and are in a constant frame of mind that says “I want that”. Look around and find somebody who is happier with less than what you have and learn to appreciate all the little things again.
Smile at every chance you get. Not because life has been easy, perfect, or exactly as you had anticipated, but because you choose to be happy and grateful for all the good things you do have and all the problems you know you don’t have. Take a little bit of time out of your day to appreciate the little things in life that you may take for granted. I think that through this humbling experience, each and every one of us can understand just how lucky we are. There will always be people making more money than you do. Period. But it is not about how much money you make; it is about how you use the money you have. There is a difference between having resources and being resourceful. You might think you need more money to feel happy about yourself, but I guess you are just not using the money you have effectively enough. There are people out there making less money than you do and still manage to live a full and abundant lifestyle. There are endless possibilities out there, but oftentimes, we tend not to see them. If you want to get over a problem, stop mulling it over and talking about it. Your mind affects your mouth, and your mouth affects your mind. It’s nearly impossible to move beyond something when you’re obsessing over it. Sometimes people throw away something good for something better, only to find out later that good was actually good enough and better never even came close. Talk about your blessings more than you talk about your problems because Someone else is happy with far less than what you have.